Deep thoughts...

   part I: "BIG TREES HOMIE"

the land down under is of the most interesting. lately i have experienced the culture shock of portion controlled meals at a costly price. on saturday at bondi beach i had to crush four australian sized burgers to quench my american thirst for more meat. I'm gonna walk off this continent at least 15 pounds lighter than when i entered. sorry mom. 

not yet have i eaten a meal since that has been under $15, except at hungary jack's (burger king) where i had a $10 wopper jr. value meal. 

last night i decided to treat myself to a plate of lobster down at the harbour. like in the states, the menu always says "market price" next to the freshest seafood platters. the swordfish was 29.50, so logically i assume a plate of lobster should be around 45-50 bones. to my surprise, my plate of garlic butter lobster turned out to be 80 fucking dollars. son-of-a-bitch. dont get me wrong, it was damn good, but for just under a hundred dollars you'd think i'd some mashed potatos and an array of succulent steamed vegetables with the tail? fuck no! just some chips and a salad that was half onions. 

damn you australia for molesting my wallet. i wont be eating out again for at least a month. that is the earliest possibility, unless this starving intern wants to start singing and dancing on the street for change. the minimum wage for all australian employees is $14, so even the commonest of man can get down on some good grub no problem, just not me for a while...

part II: "AMERICAN HAVE VERY BIG PENIS"

 

asian people have no idea how to walk, or multitask, or multitask while walking. if you are behind an asian person, and you hear their cell phone ring; move from behind them as quickly as possible. because for an asian person living in australia their legs stop working when the phone starts ringing. i have been here for a week and my stomach has seen more asians backs that a chinese hotel cot. And as you can imagine, i am at least 2-3 times the size of a grown asian male, and when we connect i tend to win that battle. i'm like a train through a pigeon. so get of the tracks when the trains coming through. 

Aside from that, this city is absolutely beautiful. the sites, restaurants and markets of a water side community always have so much to offer. I have been here a week now, and considering what i have seen in every jet-lagged moment of it, the next seven weeks should be quite swell.